Accountability

As for most of my fellow academics, it's the time of year when I'm asked by my department chair to turn in materials for annual review. As Best Professor Friend commented yesterday, the fact that we're submitting materials now for a process that will end, in all likelihood, in OCTOBER, when we actually get a numerical confirmation of a raise, is, well, ridiculous. Still, it must be done. I find myself thinking of words like "assessment" and "accountability" as I sit here trying to write. "Trying" doesn't really count, as far as annual reviews go, only actual publications in print. Thankfully, I do have things in print for the review period, and I have 3 critical essays, and a couple of smaller things, that should appear in print sometime in 2009 (for next year's review). Book manuscripts continue to make the rounds, desperately searching for home.

Publication seems far removed from what I do as I sit at my desk, pecking out sentences. Sometimes, though, I get so caught up in the idea of writing for publication (meaning that the projects I choose to work on all have publication as its ultimate goal) that I lose sight of the fact that writers simply write. With that in mind, I have been trying to start my writing mornings by simply exercising my skills, playing with words, writing stories and poems that will never, ever, ever appear on my CV.* When I think about the possibility of having a sabbatical in a couple years, I think of long stretches of time when I read and write without the pressure of where will this go? how does this fit? So far today I have done a bit of both kinds of writing:

1. I started a double abecedarian, one of my favorite playful forms of poetry.
2. I played with clunky sentences in my R&R that really should be sent back in the next week. I think it's almost there.
3. I also came up with potential syllabi for next year's classes [I'm totally stoked about my course assignments!] and ordered exam copies of books I don't own.

This afternoon will be heavy on the teaching. I need to read for class, comment on writing assignments for both classes (while all these short pieces of writing are pedagogically useful, commenting on them daily is quite draining), and write a lecture for tomorrow (I am not a lecturer in most situations, but New Class sort of demands it). Additionally, I need to get on top of some emailing about Student Organization. And in my copious spare time--which might happen some time next week, I can dream--I need to read and respond to a dissertation chapter. I would put that off, but another advisee has warned me that many pages are coming my way. Oh, yes, this is the life.

* I find myself drawn back to the world of fan fiction, which is how gwinne got her start. If you happen to know me from that world--I know most of you are on LiveJournal--drop me a line at gwinne [at] yahoo. Would be good to catch up.