The Rest of My Life

Even though most of my readers/commenters, from what I can tell, are from the infertility/loss community, not the academic community, I find myself wanting to change gears when I've posted a lot about the goings on in my ovaries. So, here's what else is going on:

It's exam week which, when I was a student, was my favorite time of the semester. I loved the adrenaline rush and those caffeine study breaks we had in the honors dorm and using the small group study room for practicing my choreography (I took dance classes most semesters when I was in college). I loved staying up late and getting up early and pushing myself to the absolute edge. And then my best friend and I would go to Chili's and eat only appetizers and desserts and CRASH. It wasn't healthy, but I hadn't yet figured out a balanced way to do work (and I'm not sure I could have, taking 20+ credit hours per semester plus extracurriculars).

I'm less crazy about exam week now that it means frantic emails from students and a stack of student writing to read (I actually had one student ask if I would *email* the class feedback on their work! Umm, sorry, no). And it's hard to do my usual exam week routine when I'm clinic-bound two days this week (why, why, why, did it have to be the only two days I need to be on campus?!).

So, clearly, as you can see right now, I'm not in a writing groove (though, to my credit, I have already written some 800 words this morning, and not on this post!). Nor am I in my office attending to the stack of student work that needs attention (this afternoon, really). Nor am I taking care of the list of errands and life details (call cat sitter, schedule appointment with dept chair, pick up prescriptions and other drugs [baby aspirin for me, claritin for LG], pick up contact lenses, schedule LG for swimming lessons, get the car in for maintenance, clean the house).

I'm headaching, still, which is one of the reasons I'm scattered and having trouble concentrating. Got in to see the NP at my neuro's office tomorrow, basically so she can give me more drugs, which I will need if I am not pregnant in two weeks, because this whole estrogen/progesterone/hcg/Femara cocktail has pretty much fucked me up (there's a reason I haven't been on the pill since the last millennium!).

More randomly: Last night the cat, I think, killed a mouse. She woke me up in the middle of the night jumping up on my bed making some sound that made me sure she was dying and then there was a lot of running around the house and up and down the stairs, as if to say, come look what I did, mom, get up, get up, get up! And then there was an unidentifiable (but mouse-sized) gross thing on the rug in our entryway this morning that I promptly threw into the yard without really looking at it.

Anyway, I need to get back to the living and the working. I will eat lunch and go to campus shortly, and see if I can get through this stack before the next one comes in. Then spend the late afternoon/evening with LG, spend some time on the porch and get ready for the insomnia to set in. Ovidrel at 10:00 pm. I can't believe it.