I've been waiting for random people--either strangers or acquaintances--to comment on the fact that I'm pregnant. The department secretary and academic advisor, both of whom know me well enough to notice I'm substantially bigger than I used to be, haven't said anything, and it's not like I'm just going to come out with hey, did you hear my news? I've been to two doctor's offices, even, where the nurse taking my vitals failed to observe that I'm obviously gestating. Yesterday I ran into a male colleague who did seem to be eyeing my gut, but really I see why he wouldn't say anything, even if he could tell.
But today, finally, I was standing in the hallway of the building where I teach and a former student ran up to me and started talking. And eventually, after two glances belly-ward, she said so you're expecting a baby? Rather bold move for a student, but it was a nice, friendly conversation.
I don't really care what people think. But I've gone from hiding my belly in that awkward 10-15 week era to being ready for the rest of the folks in my semi-immediate social circle just to know and move on. What I really need is a gossipy friend to spread the news... maybe I'll put Best Professor Friend on that task in the next week, so I can show up to the first meeting of the year without having it be a Big Deal.
I will say it's nice that the only belly touching I've received is from Dr. Gorgeous and my friend M, who accompanied me to transfer. And that seems to be exactly right.
I never made any announcement about my pregnancy at work and there are some colleagues to this day for whom the entire topic was never broached (even though I hosted a dept seminar speaker, which included introducing him in front of the entire dept at 8.5 months pregnant). I appreciated not always having to talk about my pregnancy but to still just be a faculty colleague. Maybe some people in your dept think that you might find it more appropriate for them to not coment on your reproductive status since it technically isn't relevant to your job? I think that is why some people here never said anything to me, they didn't want to possibly be accused of sexual harrassment or something along those lines, so they figured it was safer not to say anything at all.
ReplyDeleteMaybe...I certainly don't expect to have conversations about the pregnancy with most of my colleagues (esp. the men and senior folks). But these are people I generally chit-chat with...who ask me regularly about LG, etc.
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