Tuesday, November 29, 2011

39

If you've been around Something Remarkable for a while, you know I've had a rough time with birthdays.  My 30th was in the midst of the longest-miscarriage-in-human-history.  36 involved a cancelled cycle due to Dr. Evil's incompetence.  37 was post-IVF and quickly followed by a likely chemical pregnancy.  38 I just flat out refused to acknowledge because it was my donor egg deadline.

I turned 39 today.  And it's snowing, which is amazing (even if it did screw up my plans for sushi night).  And I spent the evening in my warm home with my two kids and two cats, feeling like knowing I have everything I've wanted for so long.

And it occurred to me that that's part of what's making me so emotional these days.  Happiness, yes.  Gratitude, of course.  But a lot of disbelief and uncertainty, too.  How can this possibly be my life?  And how long will the dream last?
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12 comments:

  1. BBNovember 29, 2011 at 9:20 PM

    Happy Birthday Gwinne! Enjoy being snowed in with your beautiful family!!

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  2. AnonymousNovember 29, 2011 at 9:27 PM

    Happy birthday! And, yes, it's your life, and it's a wonderful one. Take care & enjoy the snow (I'm jealous!)

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  3. Justine LNovember 29, 2011 at 9:37 PM

    Happy birthday! I will play you some Talking Heads. "This is not my beautiful life ..."

    But yes, yes it is.

    Feel celebrated.

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  4. inBetweenNovember 29, 2011 at 10:15 PM

    Happy birthday! I think the best advice I have gotten recently has been to toally enjoy every moment because it might not last, and you won't want to have wasted a single minute of it worrying that it won't.

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  5. MoNovember 30, 2011 at 12:26 AM

    Happy Birthday, Gwinne : )

    Try to enjoy the happiness if you can. Try not to second guess too much.

    Really happy for you too. And girl, I think this IS your life. You better start believing it : )

    Mo

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  6. Mad HatterNovember 30, 2011 at 5:02 AM

    Happy Birthday, lovely lady! So glad I found you and your blog and so glad your cup spilleth over. Your children are so lucky to have you.
    Love,
    Maddy

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  7. MeAndBabyNovember 30, 2011 at 8:24 AM

    Happy Birthday (yesterday)! Yes, it's the dream. Don't question how long it will last - just ENJOY it. You deserve it! For what it's worth, I take it one day at a time.

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  8. HeidiNovember 30, 2011 at 10:28 AM

    Happy, happy birthday. And may this be only the start of many joyful birthdays with your family.

    (Today's my birthday, 49; hail, fellow Saggitarian!)

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  9. gwinneNovember 30, 2011 at 11:11 AM

    Thanks y'all! And happy birthday to you, Heidi!

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  10. irrationalexuberanceNovember 30, 2011 at 1:46 PM

    As it turns out, it IS your life, with your two wonderful children and your successful and secure academic career. Enjoy every moment of happiness as they are all well deserved.

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  11. AliNovember 30, 2011 at 6:37 PM

    Happy birthday!!! Glad to hear (read) that you are at peace with turning another year older! Enjoy the warm coziness of your family/home!

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  12. QuiltingChaosNovember 30, 2011 at 7:08 PM

    Happy Birthday!

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