I wouldn't say I'm quite at that zen spot Dr. G would like. But much closer, I think, than I've been since this cycle got started. The fact that she's recommending eSET--even if I don't want to do it--suggests her confidence about this cycle. She's pleased with my embryos, my lining, everything. She's excited, she said, for Friday.
I slept last night. I think I might have actually slept through the night if laying in bed weren't so freaking painful (I'm a side sleeper, which is pretty much impossible from PIO soreness).
Thanks to my mother and a good friend, I've worked out a plan for LG and me for tomorrow. I plan to do a bit of cleaning today so I can go into transfer and bedrest with things done. I've also got a massage scheduled. By this time tomorrow, I should have 1-2 embryos looking for a home in my uterus.
I've never been this scared in my life. But at least right now, I'm something resembling zen.
Pulling for you. Hoping this is the last time you have to deal with any of this. I'm feeling awfully optimistic for you too, for what it's worth.
ReplyDeleteZen indeed! Hoping beyond hope.
ReplyDeleteHoping hoping hoping here, as well. I have such good feelings about this one for you, and everything just seems to be working out perfectly.
ReplyDeleteSending lots of zen and good luck vibes your way!!!
ReplyDeleteYay, glad to hear things are lining up well and zen (or semi-zen) place has been found. Will be sending lots and lots of good energy your way tomorrow!
ReplyDeleteI don't think I've commented before, but I just wanted to send another voice of support and good wishes into the ether.
ReplyDeleteI certainly do understand the 1- versus 2-embryo transfer dilemma. FWIW, my RE (at a university hospital) is a prominent researcher of eSET for 5-day blasts, and he's very persuasive on the merits of this protocol. I don't have any recent citations to pass on to you, but you've probably done your research on it anyway. He and I talked about it EXTENSIVELY for each of my DE transfers, one fresh and one frozen--both of which resulted in successful pregnancies--in large part because my partner absolutely did not want to risk twins and was unwilling to consider selective reduction.
Like you, though, I probably would have been willing to transfer 2 each time, with selective reduction as a possibility. Sometimes there are benefits to being able to make these decisions without having to consult a partner.
One fascinating facet to eSET is the huge proportion of boys born as a result--something like a 2:1 ratio. Yep, I've got two boys.
Thinking good thoughts for you tomorrow.
Thanks for commenting, Heidi! Fascinating about the boys thing... do you have any research on why that is?
ReplyDeleteI can't find the article right now that I originally read (have to get the kids to bed), though I think it's dated 2008 or '07; the figure there was 64% boys vs. 36% girls. I never got a chance to ask my RE about this, since it came to my attention after I'd already "graduated." However, my Ob/Gyn opined that male embryo cells divide faster and give the illusion of a higher-grade blast. When you're only choosing one to transfer, you're going to pick that one.
ReplyDeleteIt's all part of an ingenious, medically sanctioned scheme for (continued) male domination. Just kidding.
Good luck tomorrow.. Sending you lots of zen...
ReplyDeletegood thing you're zen because I'm really excited for you... if I had your mailing address I'd be sending you boxes of HPTs
ReplyDeleteFor anyone interested, I think I found Heidi's study.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17118368
As an inveterate researcher, It tickles me so that, up until the last minute, you're still DOING YOUR HOMEWORK. I'm not sure if the link you gave is the same study I read, since I can't get in to read the whole thing (which makes me think it wasn't the one I saw), but here's one that goes into the issue of faster male development to blast.
ReplyDeletehttp://news.sego.es/PDF/5._repro.pdf
All fingers and toes crossed.
eagerly awaiting an update...
ReplyDelete